Happy Valentine's Day!!!
I did it! I finally decided on my Valentine for tomorrow and boy is she something else! She is an amazing, beautiful, kind, charming, funny and loving (I could keep going here, but you get the idea) woman.
Me!!!
Yes folks, I am my own Valentine for 2012! It's just me, myself, and I (remember that De La Soul tune?) I have known me (heart, soul and mind) for almost 35 years now (even though I don't look a day over 24, I know...lol) and who else would I rather be hanging out with on the day we collectively celebrate ALL things LOVE (I could answer that question but then I would have to kill you) besides me?! The longest lasting, best relationship I have ever had and the only one that will see me from the beginning to the end is the one I have with myself (same goes for you). The person who loves me the most. The only person who ever truly had my back 100% of the time. The person who believes in me even more than my Mom and Dad and knows that God has a special plan for my life. Seriously, if I am not my own biggest fan then how could I ever hope to attract other fans to join my team...??? Be your own biggest fan right now! I am so many things to so many people...A daughter, a sister, a niece, a cousin, a Crossfitter, an employee, a coworker, a friend. Someday, maybe also someone's wife and someone else's mother. God ONLY knows...
Our culture has done such an amazing and complete job of making us all believe that SOMETHING must be missing in our life if we are single and no holiday highlights this crap talk quite as much as V-Day does. All I have to do is have a conversation with someone who is single (or get to thinking about it for too long myself). You would think it was the end of the world or something. Well, I am here to tell you that it's not. It's not even close. Tomorrow will come and go just like any other Tuesday and you (and I) may have to deal with the fact that Deborah in Accounting got 2 dozen long stem red roses from her 'AMAZING boyfriend Johnny!!' but don't let it take away from how fabulous you are..and even this too shall pass. Just because you may not get your own bouquet doesn't mean that you are not FULLY LOVED (and AWESOME) and frankly, it's really insignificant in the grand scheme of things. You, yes YOU, are amazing and great and perfectly whole even without a man (or a woman) in your life. I hope that you know this already and that you totally believe it to be true too...Believe the hype. Own it. Then live it!
I have often wanted to put all this out there and I have always held back until now, perhaps for fear of being judged or sounding ______ (whatever word comes to your mind right now). Well folks, welcome to the decade of 30-something... where I have found my voice and now just start saying "Screw it! This is me. Take it or leave it!"...so listen to my wisdom (or lack thereof) if you like where this is going.
I have pretty much been single for most of my adult life, save one 18-month relationship in my early 20's so I like to think I know a thing or two about a thing or two. For me, singleness can be incredibly lonely at times (Omigosh can I get brutally honest here!?) and I think I see what is greener grass in other people's pastures. Let me always be mindful that they still have to mow their lawns just like me. It sometimes can be a sucker punch to the old ticker, especially when all I keep hearing is how wonderful I am by everyone who loves me. I start asking myself these questions like "What's wrong with me?" and "What am I not doing right?"
Newsflash people - I realize more and more every day that I don't have to DO anything and there is nothing wrong with me. Timing is everything in life and it's not for me or you to figure out. Just be OK with living your life to it's fullest today and every day.
It's all about focus. What are you focused on? The fact that you're single and may still be alone when tomorrow comes? Well, then your Valentine's Day is gonna suck. There are literally millions of things that are worse than being alone on February 14th, so wipe that sulky look off your face and get on the good foot with me for the day.
I am focused on the fact that I have loving and living parents who ADORE me and would lay down their lives for me. I have a sister who is my soul mate, who can feel my pain without me ever having to even say anything to her, who feels my joy and shares in the pride of my accomplishments by my side. Every single one. I am focused on the love of my friends, who build me up in confidence EVERY SINGLE TIME I am down. I will focus mostly on the LOVE that God has for me...who loves me more? Not even me. Who sees me stumble only to hold out a hand until I ask for help? Not even me. Who knows the desires of my heart and the dreams of my mind better? Not even me. So I think I will rest my mind and leave the tough stuff up to Him and I'll go about the more exciting business of living my life to the fullest. It does, after all, have an expiration date.
Even though I am celebrating tomorrow sans man (the tingle-in-the-dingle kind of love), I am celebrating all the other kinds of L.O.V.E. with my favorite person...me. If you are single, and loathing the idea that you have to trudge through the over-commercialized, chocolate hearts, Mylar balloons and really bad jewelry ads that is Valentine's Day, loathe no more!! Get to the business of reminding yourself how incredibly great you are. Here's an idea. Do something nice for yourself tomorrow. Take yourself out to lunch. Get a pedicure. Go to the gym and have a really good workout. Walk on the beach. Order in some take-out for dinner and watch the Heat beat the Pacers at 7:00pm. Thank yourself for being your Valentine...it's quite alright. I suspect that not everyone who DOES have one is thrilled about theirs. (but hopefully everyone is)
And call your Mother...she misses you and loves you!
Don't settle for anything less than the best.
Three things endure through everything...faith, hope and love. And the GREATEST of these things is LOVE.
Do you feel the love??? Because I certainly do.
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