The funniest thing that hasn't happened to me since the last funny thing

I am an occasional klutz. I guess it just goes with my irresistibly nerdy/bubbly/flaky personality. Every once in a while, when the mood hits me right, I fall down or run my shin into glass tables or even clip various equipment at the gym with my hips. What I am about to describe in glorious detail is an event that is easily the most idiotic stunt ending in self-inflicted physical pain I have ever attempted (unknowingly).
On nights I don't have school, Jennifer and I go for a nice 8-mile (skip corny Eminem joke) bike ride around the neighborhood. Last night was no different, except for one thing. As we were getting ready to exit the development we live in, there was a car at the stop sign. I decided to hop onto the sidewalk just in case the car didn't want to stop for me to go around it...
As a result of getting onto the sidewalk in my development, there is a patch of grass that I need to pass through to get to the 'major road sidewalk'. I normally avoid that because there is a pretty good sized hole SOMEWHERE in there...Oh yeah, you know where this is going now.
OK, so we are exactly 1 minute into this workout of 40 minutes and the sidewalk ends and I roll onto the grass. I see the hole just up in front of me and I turn the handlebars to avoid it. Little did I know that was NOT THE HOLE that I needed to avoid.
It all happened VERY FAST and the absolute BEST part is that the split second before it did happen, Jen (who was in front of me at the time) looked back to check on me and saw the whole painfully embarrassing episode unfold.
So my front tire hits the hole I didn't see and it was pretty deep because the bike completely STOPPED where it was. Bodies in motion (remember Physics 101) being what they are, mine did NOT stop. My entire person (all 5 feet 9 inches of me) flew over the left handlebars and into the air in a sideways airborne roll. When I hit the grass, I army rolled it one complete turn to land on my back. My eye-glasses stayed on and my ipod didn't stop playing. I laid there for a minute in complete and utter embarrassment and...frankly, shame. My sister is yelling (over the volume of her own ipod) "Are you OK...Lauren...Are you OK???" Yes, I was OK. It actually didn't hurt physically at all...my pride, however was another story completely.
The words dummy, idiot, stuntman, and stupid came flooding into my head all at once. I was really angry...so much so that once I finally did get up I cursed the hole. I pulled the dirt out of the handlebars and checked myself for open wounds and the tires for blowouts. I cut my finger but not enough to even make it really bleed. Then I started yelling at Jennifer to get going so we could finish the ride (another shame-induced side effect of the public bike crash). She asked several more times if I was OK and then she looked at me with 'that look' that asked if it was alright for her to start laughing now. I started laughing first and then she started in and then I had to calm myself down or I was going to lose my bladder. I asked her how the whole thing looked. She said it very graceful, but it looked like it hurt...like a stuntman. COOL. I laughed about it (and am still laughing as I recall it to you) several more times before we were finished with the ride.
It wasn't until I was in the shower and realized the extent of my Jack-Ass tomfoolery. Just below my right knee was a huge purple bump. It felt like a second knee and it hurt! So I iced the swelling down to half it's size and I'll just wear pants for the next week. My left shin didn't fare much better either. It basically looks like I was beaten about the lower limbs with a baseball bat. sexy.

I will tell you this though. It was FUNNY...FULARIOUS (hoping that one will catch on) and I only wish that it was caught on tape, because it was a truly magnificent example of an idiot move. I pulled a 'Lauren'...

Until next time...

You are an obsession...you're my obsession

What could it be you ask?
It's ALL THINGS Pin Up! 1950's hairstyles (think barrel curls and victory rolls with fake flowers pinned at the base) and makeup (think heavy black eyeliner that curls into cat eye corners with BIG false eyelashes and bright shiny red lips) and clothes and swimsuits. There is something so understated about the whole look and feel of it...specifically regarding women and their sexuality. Everything wasn't put on display for the whole world to see. I like that so much. I like it so much so that I have begun practicing my hair-do's (and don't in some cases) and getting make-up tutorials online. This sweet gal Kandee has the best tutorials and she is so beautiful. She transforms into each look flawlessly.... http://www.kandeethemakeupartist.blogspot.com/
She even has a JEM look (remember that cartoon junkie 30-somethings???)

So I have not really been one to 'celebrate' Halloween in the past, but this year I am going to find a party to go to so that I can try out my new look. I even bought a dress! Listen, after being fat and miserable for so many years and never wanting to leave the house, I am actually excited to get dressed up and put on make-up and sleeveless clothing again. Even for insignificant little things like Publix and work. I also have a friend who is going to take some pictures...oh the joys to behold! So, needless to say I am totally stoked. I can't wait to post the pictures and get the dresses delivered (not in that order)!!! Stay tuned. More to come.

Love and Hugs...

Done, I think...

I think I may have one too many irons in the fire right now. PADI certification on the way (my first pool dive is tonight), starting back to school on Monday night, reading lots of books and trying to finish them by at least five minutes before school starts on Monday night, the gym, the beach, the pool, cooking, cycling, training for my SECOND Half-marathon this year, and dealing with the online dating disaster that I have created for myself. It's not so much that it's disastrous, more just annoying at best. I can't believe I spent money on the outside chance (kinda like my beloved Bills winning a Super Bowl) that I would make a meaningful connection with someone online. Someone said it would be fun. Are we having fun yet?
I don't want another repeat of the last post, but frankly...my resolve is waning. Sometimes it just sucks knowing that you are a 'catch' and that you are not going to meet 'Mr. Right' at fill-in-the-blank bar/nightclub. Patience is a virtue, one that seems to be ever so slightly beyond my grasp today. Deep breath. Oh yeah, and I'm tired today too...Am I coming off as cranky?

The wonderful circus of online dating

What I am quickly learning is that online dating feels a lot like high school. The little jig I dance goes something like this. I express interest in someone and hear nothing. Someone expresses interest in me and they hear nothing. (Isn't it just better to be silent than try to let someone down easy? Perhaps it's only easier.) Fear of rejection is right there at the forefront. I look at you and you look at me and neither of us act on it. Sophomoric at best. I am giving this thing 3 months and that's it. At the rate I am going (just read on) the end cannot come soon enough.
On the rare occasion, he is interested in me and I am interested in him. Enter stage 2. The phone call. This shouldn't be too long or drawn out, (because either one of us could turn out to not be interested in the other after we see each other) just a quick hello to set up the first 'meeting'. If this happens to take place at somewhere like Starbucks, then it would not be classified as a date. Then we move onto stage 3. The meeting.
The meeting is simply to discover whether or not there are sparks and whether or not an actual date (stage 4 and almost impossible to reach as I am learning) is in order. Now, call me old fashioned...but if I am meeting you for coffee I expect a few (not many, mind you) things to happen. It is the all important 'first impression' right? I did my part. A cute pair of jeans, a little make-up, perfume. Not too much of anything, just enough, just a little.
On Tuesday night, I had one of these 'stage 3 meetings' with a guy at a Starbucks. Red Flag #1 - He rode his bike there. Red Flag #2 - I could see the sweat glistening/pouring all over him. Red Flag #3 - He smelled like a varsity high school basketball team at half-time. Nothing says "I feel special" like a guy who smells like a jock strap. Let me pause here and add that had stage 3 been a BIKE RIDE, I would have been in the right frame of mind to deal with his appearance. Well, being the eternal optimist that I am, I overlooked it and moved on the meeting. He didn't want any coffee, he had water. Oh...this should be fun. I ordered and paid for my coffee and we went outside to talk.
He's a decent, even a good looking guy. Tall, nice eyes, a full head of hair. As the conversation started, however, and then continued, I realized this one was not a 'keeper'. No sparks, no laughs, no stage 4 in our future. He spent half the time talking about why all the different cities in South Florida suck and then spent the other half of the time answering the questions he was asking me. Think about that for a second. I was born here...in Hollywood. Most of his trash talking was about Hollywood. Thanks dude...for not even trying. Things quickly wound down and he walked me to my car before he rode away into the night on his bicycle (I did learn he does drive a car). Another hug sans sweat and he went in for a kiss on the lips. I didn't even have time to react before the peck. All I could was chuckle a little bit...and then it happened. He finally laughed a tiny but audible laugh. I can't tell you how many attempts at humor were blocked by another question or went completely over his head. This guy has potential but not for me.
That pretty much sums it up. If for no other reason, this experience will be great to chronicle for posterity. I can't wait to see what the next one brings. This is gonna be fun.

Super-Pumped

Making friends, shaking hands, and kissing babies wherever I go. Life is really good. 2 weeks until I get to go back to Mexico, my second favorite country in the world. I am exhausted by a killer workout I took at US1 Fitness in Dania on Monday night. Just 6 exercises and 45 minutes, but let me tell you...it kicked my ass. It's nice to know that I can hang with the big boys. Made it through the circuit 5 times...(more than one of the GUYS in the class).
I am trying very hard to enjoy every day, even the WEEKdays. I am not rushing myself to the weekends so much, namely because I have to be back in school by the end of next month. I am hopeful and expectant for the next chapter in the book to start. I am reading good books (Heat & Gangs and Gangsters) and doing social things during the weeknights. Just saw the movie 'Taken' and it was disturbingly good. I am in a good place. Exhausted and slowly falling asleep while I type this...but really really happy.
I hope you are too.

I just gotta get this off my chest

Life is so funny sometimes. They (whoever "they" are) say that life is what happens when are making plans. At least I think that is what they say. Without getting too deep, I will say this. I have learned many a lesson in my 32 years. Some of them were easier to learn than others. Some lessons hurt so bad that I didn't know if I ever would recover. Well, I did. Here I am. Still learning lessons...and funny enough a few of the lessons are still the same. I heard someone say that God gives you the same lesson over and over until you finally learn it. Here I am, being schooled again. Today I pray that the Lord would guard my heart. Guard it against those things that are trying to take little pieces out of it. Guard it against the tiny chips I am putting into it every day. I also heard that the heart is strongest in the broken places. After mending itself, the heart becomes fortified in the tears and gashes and chips and rips. I wish I could say that it would just be easier to be an island unto myself, but I know myself better than that. It would never work. Who would I talk to? Who would make me laugh until I was on or over the brink of wetting myself. Side note: If you make me laugh to the point of urination, you will never get rid of me. Well, after reading that through, I admit I do feel a little bit better although I have a ways to go...and miles to go before I sleep.

What a week

Well, all I can say is that I am relieved that it's almost over. I started back to school on Tuesday for a short summer term (6 weeks) for Anatomy 2. I go after work 4 times a week for 2 hrs and then on 2 of those days (plus alternating Friday's) for an additional 2 hours. I have no idea when I will study and the teacher's accent is so thick that I have to sit in the front row and watch his lips as he speaks. Lucky me.
We officially have new neighbors and they needed to get their house fumigated before moving in. Since we are attached to them, we had to move out for 2 nights to get the house tented. Great news, free tenting! But, we don't have termites. Whatever, I am still bitter. We stayed at the Holiday Inn which wasn't the best (I'll leave it at that) and we had the dog with us too. I realize more and more that she is getting a lot older and it's hard to deal with.
I have been getting up before 6:00am each day too so that I can get a workout in. Needless to say I am exhausted and can't wait for 10:30pm tonight...school will be done for at least the weekend. For the next several weekends I will be studying, when I really wish I was at the beach. June 22nd cannot come quick enough. 6 more weeks until Chicago...that's what I am looking forward to.

Do's and Don'ts and Yes's and No's

Just a few things (nuggets, if you will) that I have picked up along the winding road of life.

Do NOT wear a fanny pack. Do jump rope. Don't drink and drive. Do go barefoot. Don't wear neon. Do paint your toenails. Don't call the toll free number on handwritten signs posted at Interstate exits (it's not a great investment property OR billion dollar idea). Do always check for toilet paper before sitting down. Don't buy T-shirts with city names of the places you have visited. Do smile at as many people as you can...it's fun and they never see it coming. Don't smoke. Live every week like it's shark week. Don't EVER sit down in a Port-O-Potty, better yet...don't even touch a thing in there if you don't have to. Try to laugh really hard at least once a day. Don't put sexually suggestive (or otherwise) e-mail address on your professional resume. Remember to RELAX and BREATHE...nothing is that bad that it can't turn around. Do try to make me laugh...that's the coolest thing ever. Never be mean to old people or animals. Do use your blinker. Don't use bumper stickers or stuffed animals as decorations for your vehicle. Say thank you and hello to people...it's fun and they never see it coming.
Have an awesome weekend...

A weekend full of culture

What a great weekend. Went to see Jersey Boys which in and of itself was awesome. What was not awesome was the location and comfort of our seats. I will never buy mezzanine seats (this a code word for cheap, uncomfortable, and far away from the stage) at the Broward Center EVER again. The storyline and the singing was great and dinner was amazing. I had the seared tuna on tomato salad and it was so good that I recreated the dish for yesterday's late lunch. Saturday was school (will it ever end?) and I ended the Anatomy class on a high point...I have a 'A', go me. Another amazing steak dinner and then Jenn and I were off to the New Times Beer Fest in Downtown Ft. Lauderdale. We had a blast. There was some really super drunk people there and the extra $30 we spent for the VIP tickets was so worth it. Nothing says 'shake my hand' better than several hundred people using port-o-lets. I ran into my Senior Class President from High School and we caught up on lots of fun stuff. After talking to him, I realized that I need to start writing more than I do, so here I am. Then Sunday, as it normally goes was more cooking (have to be prepared for the week!) and some sun, a bike ride, and a visit to my friend Jackie to say hello. I was supposed to start studying for the Lab practical and I never got around to it. I really just don't want to even start studying. I want to take the test and ace the class and be done with it already. At least I have my bike ride to look forward to tonight, even though the studying will certainly SUCK.

Easter Monday

My office at work is so cold I could hang meat in it overnight. Easter dinner was good, not great. Thank God the ham was perfect. It was a lot of fun to go back to our old church for Easter Sunday morning services. It's nice to know that the more things change, the more they stay the same. I am finally on facebook, punch me in the face. If I had a nickel for every person who has asked me if I am on there yet...Now this means I need to start taking more pictures so that I can be on par with everyone else who is on there. I hate my work clothes. They make me feel old and out of touch, but I am so cheap that I don't think I will buy new ones. Besides, the only person worth trying to impress there is me anyways. I might as well spend my money on clothes that I can wear on the weekends. RIGHT?! Big weekend coming up. Friday night is JERSEY BOYS with my mom and Jen. This was mom's birthday present and we are hitting up Timpano's for dinner first. Knowing how 'frugal' I am, we are going to try to get in as many 'happy hour' cocktails as we can before dinner. Saturday night is the Beer Fest in Downtown FLL. This should be interesting. Knowing how stupid drunk people get at the wine tastings I have been to this should just a step below that. We have a designated driver as well. I have lost 10 pounds in the last four weeks and I have managed to find a way to find something wrong with that. Lovely. Bad news; my gym boyfriend has a girlfriend so I had to break it off midway through a set of jump roping this morning...onto the next one I suppose. Note: This was not a real boyfriend, simply a guy I enjoyed (Past tense now) watching do calf raises and other various exercises. I watched The Departed for the second time yesterday. That movie is so good. A little long and a lot of F-bombs, but so good. I can't wait to get back onto my bicycle after work today. For the record, there are things that one can only think and never say out loud...even in a forum such as this one. I am thinking, thinking, thinking...

Cool Front

The weather this morning...are you kidding me? I love South Florida!
Life is moving along at a medium pace today. I am into my fourth week of '2-a-days' and after 3 weeks have already lost 9 lbs. Go me. A few things that I noticed during my morning gym workouts; Guy with the cologne on at 6:45am in the morning, NO. No one is impressed and if you are going to directly to work after you leave without showering than you are gross. Guy with the black socks and the Teva sandals, you are my hero. The fact that you can pull that off each and every morning amazes me. Gym boyfriend, you should work out every morning. Twice a week just isn't cutting it...I'm not counting or anything crazy like that. So the afternoon bike rides have been amazing. Even in the crazy wind last night I felt great. A mountain bike with very low handlebars is not my recommended bike for use, but it gets the job done. I always have a recurring nightmare that I am going to get hit by a car and then run over by a completely different one. Not only because no one pays attention to cyclists, but I have come close to hitting a few of them myself while driving. So I am relegated to sidewalk cruising and I am OK with that. I can't believe that this Sunday is Easter. Jesus is Risen from the dead! I am going to a Passion service on Good Friday and Easter services at Mom's church on Sunday. The next thing to think about is the menu. I will definitely make a bourbon and brown sugar ham (which will someday get me married, it's that good) and then the rest is up in the air...decisions, decisions.

Ode to Hummus

Hummus, how I love you,
No one will truly know.
I dream about you before my mouth touches your silky goodness,
Longing about the next time I will enjoy you again.

Created out of a measly can of chickpeas and cumin,
Some Tahini, salt and pepper, and roasted garlic.
Fire roasted bell peppers and lemon juice and just a touch of oil,
You fortify me with 16% of my daily fiber intake.

Paired with carrots or naan,
or simply eaten with a spoon directly from the food processor.
My love for you knows no boundaries,
I will shout it from the rooftops.

I don't care what the girl across from me at work thinks,
About the way I clean the Gladware container every day.
Thank God for long fingers and small containers,
My insatiable hunger will never be satisfied.

Until tomorrow my love,
Until then.

Just another day

Does the guy on the elliptical machine next to me know that he is singing/grunting every third syllable of the song pounding away in his head from the ipod attached to his arm? How bad of a singer do you have to be that I can't tell what song you are horribly attempting to belt out in between gasps for air? I went on the most amazing bike ride last night after work with my sister...the weather right now is just too beautiful to not go outside and do something in. My new office location at work is now in the Accounting Dept and it is SO quiet there. No one talks. I can't even get a 'bless you' when I have a good sneeze. Thank God for headphones that plug into my PC.
At first I didn't like my new hairdo, mainly because it was a 5-hr process that almost brought me to tears. Now I absolutely LOVE it. It's basically the same haircut I had for several years after I finished high school. Short in the back and longer in the front. Kind of a Victoria Beckham inverted bob of sorts, only with curly hair. Yesterday, specifically, was the turning point for me. In a rush to get to work on time (which ironically NEVER happens) I didn't have time to pin it back so I wore it down. In a word...fantastic. I rode to Publix with the windows down and never bothered trying to straighten it out when I got back to work. I don't know why I ever stopped this style...wait, I do. It costs money to keep your hair short and I am cheap. Well, now I know where to get a $12 haircut (that same place) and if I have to go only once every 4-6 weeks then it's worth the time spent.
I saw a good movie yesterday called Dandelion. Very short synopsis: It's an independent film from a few years back about a kid in a small town and how love can change people. I have realized that a lot of the independent films I watch are not necessarily ones with 'Hollywood endings' so much as they are just a couple hours of retrospective into the lives of how most people live. Another great one was Bella. It was about a relationship between a rising soccor star turned cook (due to a past terrible mistake in his early life) and a waitress in a NY restaurant. That was an amazing film.
I have the best plan for my birthday this Friday...get up early and walk the dog; homemade lattes; go to the beach and watch the sunrise then take a nice long walk at the Hollywood Broadwalk; get some breakfast and a few hours of sun; a light meal at the Greek restaurant in Hallandale and the rest is still somewhat up in the air. I know that the family is taking me to dinner but I haven't decided where to go yet. Decisions, decisions...

Pic of the sunrise on the morning of the Half-Marathon this year

Manic Monday

What a great weekend. Complete washout on Saturday aside, it was AMAZING. I have the remnants of just a little too much sun from yesterday all over me. Can I just stop here for a minute and just say that I live in THE MOST BEAUTIFUL weather in all of the U.S. of A.??? Went to school on Saturday morning and felt a little like the walking dead. But it was a good school day. 96% on my EXAM and 93% on my lab quiz. The consummate overachiever that I am, I am upset that I didn't score higher on both of those. A little laser hair removal and then had an AMAZING filet mignon steak dinner later that night. I watched a new movie too, 'Rachel Getting Married'. It was not my favorite and this one has gotten a lot of buzz. Frankly it was depressing, although Anne Hathaway was truly brilliant as the 9-month sober drug addict back in town for her sister's wedding. Very believable and not once did I think of any of the other cutesy roles she has been in. Sunday was great too, although I did not go to church...yet again. This really sucks, because I miss church...and I hate the process of finding a new one. If I am being honest with myself, I am being lazy and a little bit bratty about the whole thing. I do have plans for Good Friday and Easter Sunday services which I am looking forward to. I can't believe that Easter is 3 weeks away. I did a little shopping at the mall and Target. I got a new pair of sandals, thanks Jen, in the wrong color...thanks guy from Macy's who wasn't listening to me when I said I DIDN'T want the white ones. Got a sports bra for $11.88, thank you very much. Spent a few hours in the sun, finally painted my toenails again and had another really great dinner with some of my best friends. Last week I did a nightly bike ride after work (a little over 8 miles) every night except Wed and I am happy to say that I am 5 lbs lighter. I would love to drop another 5 before my birthday, but that may be pushing it since it's Friday. At least I have the day off and the schedule planned...

And now some more things for your reading pleasure:
1. I am so scared when I have to sneeze when driving in stop & go traffic on the highway since I know I will have to blink each time I sneeze.
2. I am deathly afraid that in a rush to get to my car in the morning I will fall down the flight of stairs from my Dad's apt to the parking lot and land at the bottom of the concrete in a bloody heap. I think of this EVERY single time I walk down them. I always hold onto to the railing.
3. People who are not capable of driving while talking on the cell phone should not be allowed to. Nothing should change about the rate of speed you are traveling just because you are trying to figure out where to go for dinner tonight.
4. I can't wait until my trip to Chicago...I am going to party my face off and I will need it after a 6 week summer term of Anatomy 2.
5. I have a gym boyfriend. He's not a real boyfriend, he's just that guy who I look forward to seeing each morning when I workout. He's shy and we don't say much but I have claimed him for my own.
6. I can't wait until Friday...happy 32 to me. I don't feel a day over 13.

Movies and more

Here I sit with my headphones on listening to my FANTASTIC play list while I think and type. Life has been busy lately. Anatomy test and lab quiz in the same day, lovely. After that a 5-hr hair color and cut by an Aveda student. Started riding my bike after work each night (plus the morning workout) this week and I am OFFICIALLY EXHAUSTED! Thank God today is Wednesday, because I am taking the night off and I think I might treat myself to a beer. Just one.
I registered for the summer term and it turns out that my minimal social life will be reduced to the 3-night trip to Chicago in between the A and B term. I also moved my office at work today and I can't wait to take as shower. I wish I had a seat in there so I could sit down and just let water wash away the day. I thought I would have more to say, but as it turns out I am so physically tired that my mind has given up the thought process...here's to hoping I remember the way home.

Done and done...

Well, I ran the half-marathon and it was awesome. Beautiful weather, an awesome ipod mix, and just myself to run with. No one to catch up with or beat out (I am very competitive). It was so much different than 2007. It was a lot warmer and it never rained. They switched up the course a little bit which was a nice change. I did secretly hope that I could have beat my 2007 time, but I actually ran it 3:02 minutes slower this time...I am still getting BETTER with age. Right around mile #6 my knees starting burning but I just ignored it. Then around mile #9 my hip flexors and butt were on fire...just keep running, running, running. It started to get a lot warmer by that time too, but I knew I was in the home stretch so I just decided to bang it out. I saw my photos online last night, and let's just say that I won't be purchasing any of those. I went back to the gym this morning and took it a bit easy for the first day back. I did get on the treadmill and I did run a few minutes. Tomorrow is another day. I can definitely say that after Sunday's run, I am CONFIDENT that I will one day run an entire marathon all in one day. I am kind of hooked now!

Running the Race

Life has been all about house hunting, the tax man, paying off debt, learning to take blood pressures, working and running and the day has finally come...almost.
Sunday morning at 6:00am is the big day. I am thinking it will take me around 3 hours to run 13.1 miles. This is slow by running standards, but I don't care. I am running a half marathon...and if I add it to the half marathon I ran 2 years ago, I have run a whole marathon. I have been able to raise close to $200 already for Love Bags and I am ecstatic about that, because I felt almost bad for asking for the money from anyone because times are so tight these days. I am never surprised or overwhelmed by the generosity of my family, friends, and coworkers...THANK YOU! I could not have done this without you.
I have learned that one should never hold on too tightly to any one thing just in case they miss something better to come along for them to grab a hold onto. Lots of words in the last sentence, a little deep in nature, but still true. I will be back on Monday with a race update. I would love to beat my 2007 time, because that only proves I am getting BETTER with age!

Home Owner?

I have wanted to own my own home for several years now and the market has finally turned in such a way that this might actually happen. I am in the process of applying for a loan so that we (Jen and I) can put an offer in for a Short Sale property in the neighborhood we currently live in. There are many advantages to this thought process. 1) We know and LOVE the neighborhood 2) We will be close to our Mom 3) We know the neighbors and it's a very quiet area in the development 4) We get to shop at the same Publix!!! and 5) The only work the house needs is a new coat of paint in the 2nd bedroom.
Hopefully the bank will accept our offer and we get the house. If not, it was not meant to be. I would love the house, but I will not allow every next breath to hinge on it!

Can you spell C-O-L-D???

I can never seem to sleep all the way up to the alarm going off each morning at 5:53am, and don't ask why the alarm is set for 5:53am. I usually wake up out of a dead sleep sometime between 4:45 and 5:45am just to wait for the alarm to sound. I have been cursed as a "morning person".
I knew last night that I wouldn't make it to the gym today namely due to the predicted early morning temperature of "feels like 28 degrees" and I was right. I woke up at 5:45am and the alarm went off at 5:53...snooze. Alarm again at 6:02...snooze. That went on until 6:50am when the dog started to bark for her morning walk. I put on the following high-fashion outfit: a gray tank top and blue house pants followed by a mismatched gray sweatsuit, fur-lined dark brown suede boots and a red hoodie with a broken zipper and several holes at the wrists. With the hood on, I ventured outside in what felt like 28 degree and windy weather for the dog's 15-minute morning walk. As I rounded the corner at the end of my block I saw a dead lizard of some kind. It was either a baby iguana or a very large green lizard. It's belly was about the circumference of a quarter. It was on it's back, frozen in time. This is actually a very good thing, because South Florida as a whole has a problem with the iguana population. I actually heard Ron McGill (Metro Zoo fame) say that he was looking forward to this cold snap killing some of them off. So my suggestion to you is to be careful walking under trees over the next few days and nights...because the last place these lizards stay before they plummet to their frozen deaths is that tree limb you are standing underneath.

Today's musings

• Yes, I am still running the A1A Half Marathon and, no, I haven't trained as much as I should have.
• I went to see 'Defending the Caveman' on Saturday night and fell asleep during the show. Not my favorite, although the friends I went with were so much fun and we had a great time with them.
• I'm tired. School, work, the gym, and finding time to relax is taking it's toll on me. I need to rest, really rest. Chicago seems WAY too far away and I need a break.
• We had all the wood removed from the front of our house and changed to stucco. It's not even painted yet and it already looks 1,000 times better.
• I don't feel well today, and I think it was something I ate over the weekend. I'm not hungry and haven't eaten anything yet and it's already 12:30pm...very unlike me.
• I can't wait for the next cold front to come to town.
• I can't wait to go to bed tonight. I love sleep.

Book Review: The Shack

A fictional story, written by Wm. Paul Young initially and only for his 6 kids, is about one man's journey from grief and anger to reconciliation with God. I have been reading a lot of reviews online about how this author doesn't get a lot of things right...or aligned properly with the Bible. I am certainly not going to try to pick it apart here either.
All I can say is that I did enjoy the book. It started off slow and I had some difficulty with the personifications of the Trinity, but I read on past those things to just enjoy the story...and I did. It was sweet and there was healing and hope. Did I say I liked it? Jen is going to read it next (and my Dad was the one who first read it) and then we will pay it forward.
I only read the 66 books of the Bible as truth, everything else is just opinion. Everyone is entitled to theirs...even the really smart people who are 'experts' in their fields. I am expert in nothing. I excel at things like:
-Saying something I shouldn't in front of people who don't understand my humor.
-Needing to use the restroom when there is not one in sight.
-Day dreaming.
-Spending money (in my head) on things I can't afford (and don't need).
-Waking up at 5:45, just 8 minutes before the alarm goes off.
-Clipping coupons
So you see, all I can say is that I read and finished the book (which is an amazing feat in and of itself) and I liked it. I recommend you read it, if for nothing more than the opportunity for us to discuss it further.
Hugs and Kisses and Happy Days...

Silver Lining...I see you

OK, so I am so cool that I drive a stick shift, yet less cool because it's a 4-door Sedan. Over the weekend I noticed it became VERY DIFFICULT to get the car into gear. I didn't really think too much about it until this morning, when I couldn't get the car out of 'reverse' and into '1st' gear when I was leaving for the gym. Crap, just what I need...another $1000 car problem. I knew it couldn't wait any longer so I brought it into the dealership. The guy calls me an hour later and says something like..."blah, blah, blah, master cylinder in the clutch..blah, blah...Slide cylinder and draining all the fluid, small leak, blah, blah...hydraulic system, ready by 3:00pm...$558.25 before taxes". Double crap. This kind of stuff usually happens when I have just come into some money (3rd paycheck in a month, twice a year) and in this case it will be my much anticipated tax return check. Perfect timing!!! I was going to pay off the last of my new bed and another bill to be DEBT FREE! Here's hoping that I can still do that and pay off the car.
Then I get to work to see an e-mail about tonight's Love Bags and how some friends and strangers of mine are going to go around to some of my homeless neighbors in Fort Lauderdale and bring them food, water, sweatshirts, and the love of Christ. PRIORITY CHECK?! All I can think about is how I am not going to have as much money to spend while in Chicago to ultimately blow on high priced food and wine and these people are sleeping on concrete.
Now I can start to see it and it is actually starting to blind me. I got up this morning out of a brand new bed with freshly washed sheets, put on brand new sneakers, drove a car with a half tank of gas that I own outright to a gym to work out while listening to my ipod with brand new songs. Then I got back into the car and went to my Dad's place to take a HOT shower and get ready for work, called my boss from my brand new text-friendly cell phone to say I would be late and then went to the dealership. Then I got ride to my well paying job by my loving father only to open the Love Bags e-mail. It really puts it all into perspective, doesn't it? All this time I am complaining that I have to fix this problem, yet in reality, I am blessed that this is the biggest challenge I am faced with today.
Thank you Lord, for every single thing you have given me...every opportunity, and every blessing. Thank you most for my lunch that you allowed me to purchase ingredients from Publix and cook in my kitchen. Thank you for my ride to school and my CORE quiz at 4pm and my ride home. Thank you for allowing me to see the silver lining well before I fell into the self made hand-crafted pit of woe I almost finished digging. I love you the mostest!

My Weekend

First off, my Anatomy professor kind of sucks. The guy has a doctorate degree and he pronounces enzyme as EMZYNE and all I can think is "Hey guy, if I have to call you Doctor So-And-So then I expect you to get the little stuff right." He's also exceptionally boring to listen to, and let me tell you, at 8:00am on a Saturday I need a little inflection in my professors voice when he's talking about the joys of Cellular Chemistry.
Publix was predictable, nothing to mention there. I did make some curried chicken (Monday potluck) and stuffed peppers (Greek style) and went to a fun party for Cara's graduation. Even with a splitting headache, I laughed myself silly, almost pissing myself in the process. That is my gauge of how good a time I am having, the amount of urine that could (or does) end up in my pants.

Now, I have skipped a line to tell you about 'The Wrestler'. In a word, heartbreaking. In two words (one that I just made up), heartbreakingly fantastic. Mickey Rourke lived up to the hype and then some. It is a story about how, with a lifetime of choices a man is given, his decisions led him to his current state. The plot is similar to many people's own lives, just substitute 'washed up pro wrestler' with another profession. It was painful, with no Hollywood ending in sight, yet it captured me and never let go. This guy deserves every good review that comes of this movie. There is nudity, violence, and several 'F' bombs and I overlooked all of that to get to the meat and potatoes of the story. In reality, you couldn't have one without the others. If you see this movie, tell me what you think. So far, the only person I can talk to about it is my sister, which is cool...but, she feels the same way I do about the movie and I am always open to other opinions.
Next movie is Slumdog Millionaire...can't wait.

Renaissance Woman

I like to think that I live a very cultured life, when in fact, it's pretty mundane with an occasional bit of excitement thrown in for good measure. I love many different kinds of movies, including but not limited to; foreign films, classics, comedies, and thrillers (think anything with Morgan Freeman). I love music, including classical and opera, old school country, jazz and anything that Cadillac Records put out, good old rock and roll and songs about faith that bring to my knees. I love wine and good food (think gourmet on a budget). I love to travel and write and dream and take pictures. All these things make me feel like the modern Renaissance Woman. Now I know that doesn't really make that much sense, but it's how I view myself.
This in no way, shape or form, leads me to my weekend plans.
I have the regular stuff, school, Publix shopping for the upcoming week, and church on Sunday. I also have some fun stuff planned...a party for a friend who just graduated college and.....drum roll please...I am going to see 'The Wrestler'. I have been routing for Mickey Rourke to make a comeback right around the time he started sinking fast while boxing in his South Beach nightclub. This guy used to be the 'bees knees' in the mid-80's, far too long ago for me to appreciate him. I recently saw one of his more popular films and while he wasn't Oscar-worthy in his acting skills, he was easy on the eyes. When I heard he just got nominated for Best Actor Oscar for The Wrestler, I read up on the buzz surrounding the film and I knew I had to see it. Next weekend is 'Slumdog Millionaire'. I want to see them both this weekend, but I think I am going have to let one really soak into me before I see the other one, because I have a gut feeling they both are going to be...THAT GOOD.
I finally saw 'Persepolis' at the suggestion of a friend almost a year ago and it was really good. Google it, because it's too much to get into here. I will be back soon with a movie review and I hope your weekend is as good as mine.

When I grow up...

When I was a lot younger (Elementary School) I had pretty high hopes for my career, including but not limited to...Astronaut (the thought of potentially donning Depends to wreak mischief on my pretend lover's REAL girlfriend now leads to thank myself I didn't pursue that one) and President of the United States (It could happen, maybe...someday). Then I got to High School and wanted to be a Doctor (I didn't "apply myself to my studies" and therefore never thought I was smart enough), SNL Feature Player (back in the Chris Farley, Adam Sandler, and David Spade days), Stand Up Comic (have you ever heard me try to retell a joke? It's like giving a cat a bath), a Published Author (does it count that I publish myself online?) and a Broadway Dancer (I love to eat too much and was afraid of failure). Then I got to college and started working in travel, taking Business classes and I just wanted to finish school. That's when I wanted to be a Travel Writer. Then the Food Network came on TV so I thought I could master that too (although I was never formally trained and was afraid of failure) or be a Restaurateur (do you know what the failure rate is there?). Here I am now, on the brink of turning 32 and I am back in school so that I can be a Nurse when I grow up. I can take your blood pressure and turn you on your side in your bed, and if you need assistance to your wheelchair, I'm your girl. I still want to be on SNL (or at least write for the show) and deep down inside, I know that someday my 'big break' is going to come. When that happens, whatever I end up doing will not feel like work because I will love it...and deep down, in the deepest and most quiet parts of me...I never want to grow up.

Yes we will...

That is all I can say at this point. No, I didn't vote for him...but I will be praying for him. I don't want to see him fail either, contrary to what everyone I have spoken to about the election may think. Politics is all about choosing the 'least worst' candidate for any given office. Same thing goes for the POTUS. I do want change in this country. REAL CHANGE. Not change for a dollar, not spare change, and not just a changing of the guard. This is the hardest job anyone can do and to think for a moment that I (or anyone else for that matter) can sit back as an armchair quarterback and shout out plays from the sidelines is ridiculous. I have already seen him age more than the 2 years it took him to get to today. When everything is said and done, he is going to have even more gray hairs. President Obama...make me proud.
On a lighter and less politically charged note, however, intertwining all the while with the events of the day...what a great day this has been so far. The weather kind of sucks. Gray and overcast and kind of cold and getting colder by the minute. We may be in the upper 30's tonight which never happens here so it's a big deal. I went to get gas in my car after the gym this morning and the pump stopped on $21.00 exactly! Loves it. I have school tonight and I am not ready for the quiz...again...but I will wing it and hope for the best. This is life. What can I say?

1-13-09

This is going to be a totally jumbled mess of thoughts...very much like the way I normally think when I am not writing it down. So I am smack dab back in the real world. I've been to both of my classes once and I am going for straight A's again. I forgot how much time school takes up, namely the time on the weeknights I would have spent watching The Biggest Loser or American Idol. Tuesdays are definitely the worst because I am up before 6:00am, gym, work, and school goes from 4 - 10pm. Yep, 10:00pm on a Tuesday night. The worst part of it is that tomorrow morning I have to be up again at 6:00am for the gym.
Happy Birthday to my little-big girl Tyra. She's 12 years old this month. I was never sure about her exact birth date. I hate clipping the nails on her back paws because I am afraid I will draw blood and I also think she is going deaf, which is hard for me to deal with. She's 12 and I know what the life expectancy for a large dog is and how the decline begins. Very morbid stuff, I know but that's the circle of life. She still thinks she's a puppy and that's all that matters.
I already have one of my New Year's Resolutions crossed off the list, and that actually happened on the 9th. Jen and I are going somewhere we have never been - CHICAGO - for an event we have wanted to go to since I became aware of it's existence - TASTE OF CHICAGO! I got a good deal on NON-stop flights (thank you Spirit) and now I have to find a cheap and luxurious hotel (a little ironic, don't you think?) My traveling life revolves around the places to eat in a city or country so I will be hunting all the cool restaurants and pubs for us to visit. Any suggestions???
Damages (on F/X) came back last week and it is one of the best written and acted shows on television. Totally worth staying up until 11:00pm for...what am I, 79 years old?
Last but not least, is it weird that I want lick my Lean Cuisine container completely clean after finishing the Fettuccine Alfredo? I mean, there's only 280 calories in there and I want every single one of them. Is it even stranger that I want to drink the leftover Ginger dressing from my salad at the sushi restaurant?

I like big butts....

Hallelujah and Praise the Lord! It doesn't just look good, but it's good for me!
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,477434,00.html
I happen to be one of those girls with a generous amount of back-side and now science is also "behind" me (pun intended).

1-6-09

So many things to say and so little time to type them...
Teddy and Teresa welcomed their BEAUTIFUL baby girl into this world at 3:41am this morning. I am beside myself with glee and I can't wait to meet her! I start school today...again (4:00 - 10:00pm). Time flies and before I know it I will be posting my cheesy graduation picture online. Jen and I are back on the hunt to buy a place of our own. It's time to MOVE OUT and have space to call my own. Besides, the market is working in my favor this year. Next - so a few years ago I read this book, 'He's Just Not That Into You' during what must have been some "omigosh I am single crises". They have made it into a movie with a bunch of actors including Drew Barrymore (personal celebrity look-alike). The funny thing about the book is that it's all true what they say about the reasons behind why men don't call, text, write you back. They are just not that into you...and that pretty much describes my love life to the chapter and verse. I am comfortably situated between 2 extremes most days. To the far left we have all the guys I would love to love who are paying zero attention to me and to the extreme far right we have all guys I wish wouldn't like me trying to pay all their attention to me. The more single women I talk to, the more I realize that it's pretty much the same for them too. What's a girl to do? Wait, I've got it...stop trying so hard!
There are 2 forces at work in my head most days. Force #1) The skinny workout, Marathon training, fit woman who reads Muscle and Fitness-Hers! and Force #2) The 'other woman' who subscribes to Bon Apetit, Food & Wine, and can't wait for the new episodes of Drive Ins, Diners and Dives to be aired on Food Network. Force #1 is winning today. I am glad that the holidays are OVER. No more champagne, cream cheese, baked spinach dip, cookies, or chocolate until Halloween please. I already have my costume picked out...wouldn't you like to know? Last but not least, this is just one of those random observations I have. There is no graceful way to exit a restaurant booth (or cab or limo for that matter) and I have finally come to terms with that.

2009...nice start

Ringing in the New Year to 2009 was perfect. A block party with a couple of old friends and several hundred new friends. A live band complete with some of my all time favorite songs.

There is nothing more fun than watching about 50-60 white people dance to the Stones and Lynard Skynard.

I was proudly one of them.

My sister was the best date...!

I have been in the backyard now a total of 4 times to work on my tan and I still have 3 more days of vacation left to get just a little darker. I really do feel sorry for anyone who doesn't live here. Flip flops, tank tops, and blue jeans should be the world standard dress code.
A few things that I want to accomplish this year...
*Get accepted into Nursing school. *Pay off all my outstanding debts and then end out the year with no new debt. *Save some more money and start taking more pictures. *And last but not least...take a vacation to somewhere I have never been before.

I hope your New Year was awesome and that all of your wildest dreams come true this year. May God bless you and keep you in perfect peace!

XOXO